BUFFALO

Buffalo Is Calculus' sidekick.

Buffalo is a test tube Buffalo. Calculus created and raised him for companionship but, with a very special caveat.

Buffalo was genetically designed to be a servile bootlicker. The Doctor is rather "needy" and craves affirmation and praise. Since he hates all humans but wanted a "Brown-Noser" around, he thought what better sycophant than a majestic animal of the plains. Plus, a servile Buffalo would be a constant reminder of man's domination over nature. Problem is - Calculus's calculations were a little off.

Some DNA from a lock of Dean Martin's hair Calculus purchased on E-Bay (He wanted to clone the Rat Pack and replace Wayne Newton as Vegas' favorite headliner.) inadvertently got mixed in with the Buffalo DNA. The result? Buffalo turned out as a suave, laid-back, singing narcissist.

The Doctor has learned to live with his mistake as Buffalo obligingly takes a few moments each day to massage Calculus' ego. This pretense keeps Buffalo in the lifestyle he's become accustomed to: yoga, facials and gourmet treats.